A commercial establishment that has a designated area where patrons can view adult material.

Theaters that are adults-only, which usually show pornographic films, and where people can go to watch, masturbate, or hook up with other theater patrons.

Reserved for adults who are 21+, usually describing parties, travel events, cruises, resorts, etc.

See “Gag”

A public Bathhouse or sauna where people (usually gay men) can meet and have casual sex with each other on the premises. Sometimes, bathhouses also have a viewing area where patrons can watch adult content and / or an area where people can use or rent rooms or areas to have sex with other patrons.

A sexual slang term that means Big Black Cock, which is usually used to describe a porn genre as well as in open and swinging communities to describe one’s preferences for a Black partner who has a large dick. However, this term can also perpetuate negative stereotypes about Black men and also fetishize Black men.

BDSM stands for Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, and Masochism. This encompasses the themes of Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, and Masochism. This can involve the psychological as well as the physical aspects of BDSM, and can be softcore to hardcore. BDSM is always done CONSENSUALLY. This means that the submissive gives permission to their Dominant to do these activities to them, and both partners are aware of the boundaries and agree to them before play. Refers to the "B" and "D" within the term BDSM: "Bondage" and "Discipline." Within BDSM, participants, usually a "Dominant" and a "submissive," might use a variety of sexual and non-sexual activities such as bondage and discipline to stimulate arousal. In bondage scenarios within BDSM, a Dominant might tie up or otherwise restrain a submissive's body parts as a form of control, and may then perform other acts on the submissive while they are restrained. The bondage may also be an end to itself, such as in the case of Shibari art, for the submissive's pleasure of being bound.

Typically refers to a heterosexual person who has an interest or "curiosity" to explore sexual activities with someone of the same gender. Within the open lifestyle, people who are "situationally bisexual," meaning that given a certain scenario or person, they may be interested in playing with someone of the same gender and this can also fall into this bi-curious category.

Big Latin Cock

To tie or wrap a piece of cloth over a person’s eyes to deprive them of sight. In sexual contexts, Blindfolding can be used as a seduction tool to elevate the blindfolded person’s other senses, and it can also be used during BDSM play wherein the submissive consents to not seeing what their Dominant will do next.

When one person performs oral sex on more than one person with a penis in a group sex or orgy scenario.

A term used primarily in Hotwifing scenarios to refer to a man / male-identified person who takes sexual "ownership" over another man's female partner (referred to as the Hotwife or Vixen) at the male partner's invitation. The term Bull implies an animalistic, aggressive, and dominant disposition that is key to the type of hotwifing dynamic / scenario sought by the hotwifing couple. See also Hotwifing.

a.k.a., Anal plug, a Butt Plug is a type of sex toy that is inserted in a person's anus, often for the purposes of sexual stimulation and / or gratification. In some cases, butt plugs may be used decoratively and may have a jewel, tail, or other decorative elements to entice their partner(s). Butt plugs are helpful to use when a person is undergoing anal training and preparing their anus to be penetrated with objects and / or other body parts (such as fingers, phalluses, etc.). See also Anal Training and Sex Toys.

Big White Cock

Acronym for “Clothed Female Naked (or Nude) Male,” which is a sexual fetish wherein the female is clothed but the male is not, which can play into a power dynamic in which the clothed person is Dominant, and the naked person is submissive. See also"CMNF"

Not having sex with people, which may also extend to masturbation. In the kink world, some people who are into BDSM may wear, or have their submissive partner wear, Chastity devices on their genitals, like cock cages or chastity belts, to prohibit them from masturbating or having sex. This deprivation can be arousing for both the wearer and the Dominant, who bears the key and plays up the power dynamic in a BDSM scenario.

Acronym for “Clothed Male Naked (or Nude) Female,” which is a sexual fetish wherein the male is clothed but the female is not, which can play into a power dynamic in which the clothed person is Dominant, and the naked person is submissive. See also "CFNM"

Usually used in kink on a submissive with a penis, a Cock Cage is a chastity device that restricts the ability for the penis to be stimulated, such as preventing it from getting a full erection. Often, a cock cage is used at the behest of a Dominant who is employing this chastity device to control, humiliate, deprive, and dominate their submissive. Cock cages can usually only be opened by the person who put it on, usually with a special key held by the Dominant.

Within Open relationships, especially Polyamory, compersion is the opposite of jealousy and refers to a person's emotional satisfaction of knowing and / or seeing the joy that their partner experiences with other people romantically, platonically, and / or sexually. Compersion is not necessary for open relationships to work. A person might experience feelings of compersion for their partner in some scenarios and with some partners, but may experience jealousy at other times.

a.k.a. Ravagement Fantasy, is a type of Risk Aware Consensual Kink (RACK) BDSM scene involving roleplaying as a person who is consensually "forced" into sex by an aggressor or a group of aggressors. Importantly, having a Ravagement Fantasy does NOT mean that the person actually wants to be raped in real life. What is enticing to a person about a CNC / ravagement fantasy is the ability to control the scene and consent to each element of the scene. There is sometimes an element of capture where the victim is taken away. Once captured, they can be bound, forcefully penetrated, and / or any other desired acts such as being physically harmed, blindfolded, etc. The aggressor(s) develop the scene based on previously agreed-upon themes by and with the person playing the "victim." All scene elements are consensual, and these fantasies are most often requested by the person playing the "victim." This type of play requires extreme trust, a strong understanding of each individual’s boundaries and limits, a safe word, and continual communication and awareness.

A colloquial term used for an older woman who typically enjoys "prowling" for younger play partners (who are still of legal age and thus can Consent to the relationship)

Within Open relationships (Consensually Non-Monogamous relationships such as Swinging and Polyamory), "couple privilege" or "couples privilege" refers to the advantage that an established couple already has before they add another person or people to their sex life and/or relationship. Couple privilege is not a negative phenomenon in and of itself, but it may reinforce a hierarchy that already exists within the relationship and have negative effects on their new partner(s) and the new relationship(s). In open relationships, to ensure equality for all involved, it is important that the already-established couple acknowledges that this privilege exists and does not take it for granted or dismiss their advantage.

An example of couple privilege in swinging is when a couple has been together for many years before deciding to open their relationship to have a Threesome with a new sex partner; but once finding this new playmate, the couple treats them as a toy or tool with which to fulfill the couple's fantasies, rather than acknowledging the needs and desires of their new playmate. In polyamory, couple privilege can be even more pronounced than in swinging relationships.

An example of couple privilege at work in polyamorous contexts is when an established couple forms a relationship with a new person to form a Triad; however, because the couple has been living together for many years, they set rules and boundaries on their relationship and / or residence and their new partner's access / rights to them. In the worst of cases, established couples give their new partners a list of rules in a "take-it-or-leave-it" way that completely deprioritizes their new partner's needs, desires, and own boundaries.

A sex act that involves a person with a penis who ejaculates into another person’s vagina or anus (e.g., anal creampie). This often involves the visual experience of watching the ejaculate leak out of the other person. 

A colloquial term for when two men end up touching each other’s penis in threesomes or group sex scenarios, often unintentionally, but sometimes intentionally.

When an individual enjoys wearing clothing that is more expressive of someone of a different gender (e.g., a masculine person wearing what is often considered “feminine” clothing, like a dress, pantyhose, high heels, makeup, etc.). This is sometimes, but not always, for the purposes of sexual arousal, roleplay, and / or sexual gratification, and when that’s the case, cross-dressing may also be considered a kink or fetish.

Driving or walking around or to a location, i.e., a cruising ground, looking for someone to have sex with, although this is also a term used for when this happens online or on the phone. Often, this is anonymous, casual, and one-off in nature.

Cuckolding is the practice of a couple in which the male partner wants to watch his partner have sexual relations with another individual (or several individuals) without his direct sexual involvement. In this case, the male cuckold acts as a Voyeur and is often (but not always) present to witness his partner engaging in sexual acts with the third person (or more people). Often (but not always), the cuckold takes on a submissive role and may also want his partner to humiliate him verbally (and/or physically) during this time with the third partner present (e.g., "He's more of a man than you are," etc.). This is done with the male's Consent (not the same as a man witnessing his wife Cheating without his consent). The female version of this is called "Cuckqueaning" or "Cuckqueanry," in which the female plays the role of the submissive who is witnessing their partner engaging in these acts with another person (or several people).

A woman or other femme-identified person who cuckolds her husband / boyfriend / other masculine-identified partner; an adulterous woman who cuckolds her male partner. See also Cuckold.

The female version of cuckold. Within cuckqueaning scenarios, the cuckquean is the female / female-identified individual who consensually watches their (typically) male partner have sex with others and is sexually aroused by this act. See Cuckold for more.

A Sex Toy that may resemble a phallus made out of silicone, rubber, plastic, metal, or glass that can be used for sexual stimulation, often for the purposes of penetration. Some dildos vibrate. Dildos can be shaped to stimulate the erogenous zones including the clitoris, the G-spot, and / or the anus. A double-ended dildo can be used to achieve dual stimulation to penetrate two individuals simultaneously. A strap-on dildo can be worn with a harness by someone with or without a penis for the purpose of penetrating another person.

A sex position where the receiver of penetration is on all fours (hands and knees) and their penetrating partner is behind them in a standing or kneeling position.

Dominance can be physical and / or psychological. This is done by the Dominant (a.k.a., Dom / Domme or Master / Mistress or Top) to the submissive (a.k.a., sub or slave or bottom). It can involve everything from verbal commands (e.g., "you're mine") to physical commands ("get on your knees"). Dominance and submission (also called D/s) is a set of behaviors, customs, and rituals involving the submission of one person to another in an erotic episode or lifestyle. It is a subset of BDSM. Physical contact is not necessary, and D/s can also be conducted anonymously over the telephone, email, or other messaging systems.

Double Penetration means that both the vagina and anus are penetrated during sexual play. DVP refers to Double Vaginal Penetration, which means that two phalluses are penetrating the vagina simultaneously, while DAP (a.k.a., Double Anal Penetration) refers to two phalluses penetrating the anus at the same time. In an Airtight, double penetration is involved as well as simultaneous oral penetration and often happens in Group Sex or Orgy scenarios.

An acronym that stands for Double Vaginal Penetration, whereby someone with a vagina receives penetration from two phalluses (which can be penises or dildos) at the same time, such as within the context of a Threesome or Group sex.

A room or area with BDSM equipment and / or play space; does not have to be underground.

A fetish that describes when a person (Exhibitionist) derives erotic enjoyment and sexual arousal by being watched and being on display while nude and / or during sexual activity. While exhibitionists may be best known to enjoy in-person viewing of their sexual escapades, exhibitionism can also include sharing erotic and explicit photos and videos online. See also Voyeurism.

A gangbang can happen when several people engage in sexual activity with one specific individual, who is the center of attention, either sequentially or at the same time. See also Airtight and Bukkake.

A Japanese term meaning "gulp," which is used to describe a sexual activity involving the consumption of semen from one or more partners, often from a serving vessel; generally performed at the end of Bukkake

Hot Husbandry is the male-gendered version of hotwifing, whereby a man's partner reaps sexual arousal and enjoyment from consensually knowing about / watching their partner / husband have sex with someone else. Despite the terminology, Hot Husbandry does not actually require that the partners be married; it is enough to be in a relationship. See also Hotwifing.

A woman / female-identified person who has a hotwifing dynamic with her (typically male) partner. A woman does not actually have to be married to be a hotwife. See Hotwifing and Vixen for more.

Known as both a Roleplay Fetish and Open relationship style, Hotwifing refers to when a woman (Hotwife) has sex with people outside of their relationship with the full Consent, permission, and encouragement from her partner. Hot Husbandry has the same dynamics as hotwifing, though the partner is male or male-presenting. In hotwifing relationships, the hotwife's partner derives erotic enjoyment from hearing about and / or watching their female partner having sex with someone else, including the preparation for the play sessions (getting dressed, planning locations, settings, etc.), choosing their hotwife's play partner (Bull), communications with their hotwife's play partner, and so forth. In hotwifing, the partner is often not present during / involved in the sexual scenarios but thrives on the details of their hotwife's encounter, either after the sex session or even during, via phone calls / videos / photos. Contrary to popular belief, a hotwife does not have to be married as a prerequisite to engaging in hotwifing; people who are dating each other can also partake in hotwifing. Hotwifing is not the same as cuckolding; while these two roleplay fetishes are similar in the way that they involve the female partner having sex with another person with the consent of their partner, in cuckolding scenarios, the partner is often less involved in the preparation for their female partner's play sessions, are typically present during the sex (while they may not be an active participant), and may also take pleasure in being humiliated by their partner and their lover. See also Cuckold.

A term referring to sexual practices that fall outside of cultural "norms"; includes BDSM, Sensory Play, and other "unconventional" or "taboo" activities. A Kink is distinct from a Fetish in that kinks are optional explorations for an individual to experience arousal. In contrast, someone with a particular fetish has an involuntary sexual arousal response to the given subject or activity (e.g., Foot Fetish, Latex, Leather, Hotwifing, Exhibitionism, etc.). For example, someone with a Foot Fetish might get aroused just by seeing someone's bare feet; whereas, someone who has a kink for bondage might not get aroused by the mere sight of rope. Someone engaging in kinky sex might try Roleplay or Bondage, for example, and they can return to "vanilla" sex and still enjoy the experience. In some cases, the Fetish object or activity becomes paramount to the person in order to achieve sexual arousal, as in, they cannot experience arousal in absence of the object or activity they have fetishized. Fetishes and kinks are both normal; If an individual's kinks and/or fetishes begin to interfere with relationships, work, and/or their or others' physical health, then it is recommended that the individual seek assistance from a mental health practitioner.

A commonly-used term for when a person is a newcomer to the Open lifestyle, Swinger, and/or Kink / BDSM scenes. Newbies are usually known as those who do not have experience interacting with others within their lifestyle and are often excited, curious, and seeking more information and like-minded people to help them get started within their community. Munches and meet-and-greet events are incredibly helpful for newbies in these communities. See Swinging 101 for more.

Within the context of sexuality and/or relationships, the term Open commonly refers to when a person is open-minded and has an ethically non-monogamous mindset, i.e., curious about and/or interested in and/or actively maintaining one or more sexual and/or emotional relationships with another person / people.

This may include, for instance, a couple that is interested in having threesomes with other people; a couple who dates other people separately outside of their relationship; an individual who is open to dating more than one person at a time. Essentially, using the term "Open" simply means that a person is or may be interested in the concept of a relationship or union that falls outside the boundaries of traditional monogamy (which means a relationship with only one other person).

Open is used synonymously to refer to various forms of Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) / Consensual Non-Monogamy (CNM), which means any relationship that is not strictly monogamous. A crucial distinction between "Ethical / Consensual" Non-Monogamy and Cheating (Non-Monogamy) is that within Open, ENM, and CNM relationships, all parties involved are aware of the open status of the other participants and give prior consent to their partner doing such activities. Cheating / Infidelity means that a person's partner is NOT aware of what they are doing when they are sexually and/or emotionally involved with another person and/or people. Cheating CAN happen within open relationships when one or more partners violate the previously agreed-upon boundaries of their relationship.

Because of the overlap in many terms and labels within the open-minded community, as well as the contexts within which they practice ethical non-monogamy, some people use the blanket term "Open" simply because they prefer to use that to say they are any of the following terms (as well as any variation of these), to name a few: Monogamish, Ethically Non-Monogamous, Consensually Non-Monogamous, Swinger, and/or Poly / Polyamorous / Polyromantic. There is no ONE right way to be open or have an open relationship; different people and relationships may have different boundaries, and as long as those work for them and everyone agrees upon these boundaries and is honest about what they are doing, open relationships can be healthy and fulfilling for all those involved.

A form of BDSM, primal play is practiced by "primals" who express their raw, animalistic side during sexual activity. Stronger vocalizations, such as growling, and physical behaviors like scratching and wrestling, are common. Some primals also emulate specific non-human animals during sessions. See also Bull.

Within the context of Hotwifing, a Stag is usually referred to as a man who encourages his female partner, known as a Vixen, to have sex with other men. The Stag may or may not engage in Group Sex with his Vixen and her partner. See Hotwifing.

Within the context of BDSM, a submissive (a.k.a., submissive / slave / bottom) is an individual who Consensually gives another person (alternatively referred to as Dominant / Master / Mistress / Top) the power to dominate them sexually. See BDSM.

A threesome consists of three people who Consensually and ethically engage in sexual activity with each other. This does not mean that everyone involved in a threesome plays with each other person; for instance, in a threesome with two men and one woman, the female might be the focus of play for both men, while the men do not play with each other. Some also refer to the desire for threesomes as "Triolism." See Group Sex.

See also Dominant. Within the BDSM community, a Top is someone who disciplines a submissive or bottom.

An expression used in BDSM contexts to describe a scenario in which a submissive (bottom) attempts to control the play in the scene, the dynamic, or their relationship with their Dominant (Top) from their submissive position by using seduction, persuasive behavior, provoking their Dominant, and other typically dominant behaviors that are uncharacteristic of submission. See also bottom, submissive, Brat, and BDSM.

In Hotwifing scenarios, a Vixen is a Hotwife, i.e., a woman or female-identifying individual who has sex with people besides her primary partner, at the encouragement of her primary partner (usually known as a Stag). See also Hotwife, Hotwifing.

A voyeur is a person who enjoys watching others having sex, i.e., an individual who engages in voyeurism. A voyeur can become sexually aroused at the sight of other people engaging in sexual activities and may also choose to pleasure themselves sexually as they watch others performing sexual acts in front of them. In some scenarios, such as "Peeping Tom" voyeuristic contexts, the voyeur may choose not to make themselves known to those who are engaging in sexual activity and may derive pleasure from the secretive nature of their watching. Voyeurism is quite common in the Open Lifestyle and in Swingers Clubs and events, and is a behavior that is often invited by Exhibitionistic couples and individuals.